Gary: I’m going to drop you off at the door to pick up the diapers, and then we’ll go to the liquor store and you can get me a drink.
Nikolas: Me too.
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That’s a picture of mommy and daddy when they got married. When I was in mommy’s belly.
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Nikolas (pants lying discarded on floor): Mommy why does it stand up?
Me: So it doesn’t fall off.
Nikolas: I don’t like it!
Me: Then don’t play with it.
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Nikolas: Mommy, can I feed Maks?
Me: No honey, you can’t do it. He needs special Mommy milk.
Nikolas (pinching his nipple): Yes, I can. See!
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Nikolas: Daddy, were are we going?
Gary: The moo juice-store.
Nikolas: That’s left. Right?
Gary: That’s correct pal.
Nikolas: Mommy, was I right?
Me: Yes you were.
Nikolas: I’m a genius.
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Nikolas: Damma, do you have the stuff to feed Maks?
Damma: Yes, punkin. I’ve got the bottle right here.
Nikolas: No not that. That! (points at her chest)
Damma: No, I can’t feed him like that. I give him a bottle.
Nikolas: Then why do you have them.
Damma: For decoration.
Nikolas: Can I see?
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While listening to Taylor Swift’s new song “Picture to Burn…”
Daddy! She said stupid. But that’s okay. She’s my girlfriend.